The Rubes

Genie
Ahonatou
Reuben Force Genie
Dreamers and greedy individuals led to the employment of this wonder. A physical fitness genie, Ahonatou can usually grant your wish if you ask him for a pair of running shoes, a treadmill, or an Olympic size weight set. If you ask him for something else however, the wish can't be granted without some conditions attatched. Ahonatou's services proved ineffective when VOOPOO BABOOTOO wished for a promotion at Burger King. Genie said that he had no connections with any BK higher ups, and if he tried to use his special twiddly wish-granting mechanism near Burger King, the electromagnetic fields would destroy it. Needless to say, Ahonatou's services to Reuben Force are limited, but his workout partner is OMAR.

Quebec
Anderson
Good Deed Doer
With his uniform proudly showcasing the colors of Quebec's flag, Anderson is here to help in any way he can. Not a superhero in the truest sense of the term (he has no super powers to speak of), he mainly helps people load groceries into their car and is Reuben Force's ambassador to Meals On Wheels. He dresses like a super hero however, because he believes that his good deeds make him one.

UPS
Grunt
Reuben Force Shipping Clerk
At the tender age of six, Grunt developed an unexplained medical condition that leaves him constantly angry. He dropped out of high school as soon as he was old enough to get a job. He became a star employee at Mailboxes Etc, where he was discovered by Reuben Force when HENVIR COUPLES stopped in one day to ship a case of mustard to his mother in Ontario. Henvir noticed Grunt's work ethic and thought that he was exactly the kind of person Reuben Force's shipping department needed. Though Grunt absolutely hates mail of any kind, it is this hatred that fuels Grunt's blinding work pace. The only thing that makes Grunt happy is the UPS uniform that he inherited from his Uncle Travis.

Plotchman
Plotcho
Condiment Distribution Engineer
Afraid of being unseen, and in an effort to avoid stainig his clothes with mustard, Plotchman is almost always seen in his trademark yellow outfit. In order to play the lead role of "Sunny" in the Reuben Force production of "Hello Sunshine" (a play written by CORPORAL TATHERTON), Plotcho painted his head yellow but failed to use removable paint, which is why he looks the way he does. Plotchman's home-made mustard is so tasty, HENVIR COUPLES sent a case of it home to his mother in Ontario.

Proportion-o
Window
Washer
With a head so big and feet so small, Proportion-o must run everywhere in order to maintain balance. He washes the windows of the Reuben Force headquarters with salt water acquired by THOM BIGG. Because he must run everywhere, Proportion-o is in immaculate physical shape, despite never setting foot in the gym.

Scaremeister
Valet
Bio coming soon.


NEXT
BACK